


Shelter from the storm

by bookwormally



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Ansem gets a mention but that's the best family tag for relationships, Dilan & Even (Kingdom Hearts) - Freeform, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, M/M, Post-Canon, Post-Kingdom Hearts III, Radiant Garden family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-19
Updated: 2019-12-19
Packaged: 2021-02-24 16:35:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,699
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21861049
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bookwormally/pseuds/bookwormally
Summary: The end of a long year of war between light and dark has come. Celebrations are being had throughout the worlds, including the rebuilt and healing Radiant Garden.Dilan's family is finally together again, almost every piece, and it should be the happiest he's felt in years. Instead, he places himself out in the cold, alone, to keep watch over an empty square.
Relationships: Aeleus & Ansem the Wise | DiZ & Dilan & Even & Ienzo, Aeleus/Dilan (Kingdom Hearts)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 33
Collections: Kingdom Hearts Holiday Gift Exchange





	Shelter from the storm

**Author's Note:**

  * For [triceraclops](https://archiveofourown.org/users/triceraclops/gifts).



> Usually I'm all in for fluff, but uhhhh I've had some thoughts about Dilan/Xaldin and exactly what it means that he was not sent to Castle Oblivion and the rest of his family was. Don't worry though! His family is back with him now.
> 
> This is my first time writing Luxord so hopefully, it's not a complete mess. Happy Holidays!

Xehanort is dead.

The worlds are at peace.

Everything is better than it was before.

It’s perfect.

The cold wind that blows across Radiant Garden is a shock to old and new residents. The Garden is known for temperate weather year round, but the temperatures plunged in the face of a howling storm. Lord Ansem and Even theorized that it was one effect of the recent upheaval throughout the worlds. Such powerful forces send ripples throughout the universe and the effects will have a far reach. A storm they could weather, strange as it may be, and they could bring in many of the residents of the city if needed. Honestly, Even seems excited about it.  _ Scientists. _

They hardly need to stand guard with a storm howling outside and the biggest threat they’ve seen taken care of quite handily. But, Dilan likes being out, making sure no one’s stuck outside in the elements.  _ He can’t stand the thought of another death he could have prevented. _ He bundles up in thick layers and takes a post at the top of the stairs where he can see clearly down to the square. The winds are easy to deal with; he tugs them around him in streams that keep them from whipping at his face.

Dilan can’t do anything about the cold and he stares blankly at the stones of the stairs and the fountain far below. The cold works its way slowly into his fingers, his limbs. The grey of the stones pales, goes white, and Dilan blinks away the shadows before they can sink into his mind.  _ He’s home. He’s home and so is everyone else. Even is back now, the last of them to finally return to the place where everything went so horribly wrong. _

He hunches into his coat and scarf and makes himself think of things that are brightly colored, that are warm. Ienzo snorting and choking on his hot chocolate as Even accidentally dumps a spoonful of salt into his mug. Aeleus carefully laying out bits of greenery like puzzle pieces before he begins the work of making some kind of centerpiece. A knock on the door and then the shuffle of cards, ‘ _ another game?’ _

The cold snaps at him, the winds whipping his hair into his back and his face. Dilan throws a hand out and messily shoves them away. They whine and howl around the castle and he feels too warm.

Everything is  _ too _ perfect. 

Ansem and Even have atoned, even Ienzo feeling like there was something he had to make up for despite that it was his guardians who led him so far astray.

They all have their scars.

Dilan’s are well hidden. His end at Sora’s keyblade was...minor compared to others. He deserved it.

_ She was so slight in his arms, so easily breakable. ‘Love,’ he called mockingly. ‘What a foolish thing to believe in.’ He could have thrown her to the winds, made them watch her shatter on the stones so far below. He wouldn’t have cared. He scoured what feelings tried to grow in him out months ago. _

_ All because of a sign. _

_ The boy had brought the key down hard on his shoulder and Xaldin had fallen to his knees. He could feel the end, the way his insides dissolved into shadows. Funny, the numbness lasted even through this. He was empty, scorched and burned like the highest points of the mountains blown apart unceasingly by the wind’s breath. Yet, he was relieved. _

_ Xaldin vanished from the worlds on a bridge, thinking of home and the arms he wanted one last time. _

It is too cold, no one’s outside now. The sun will set soon and everyone has made themselves warm, pulled themselves together to celebrate with family, friends, and neighbors.

The holidays, not a concern for others, chased him outside. Dilan couldn’t take it, couldn’t take the cheer and the warmth, the way it looked like a ballroom glowing with magic and golden light. What has he done to deserve such a thing?

When they got the news of Castle Oblivion, of members lost, he had felt newly hollow.  _ Exterminated. _ Anger was easy, used to be so easy, but they have been empty shells for years. 

_ Exterminated. A boy he used to be able to swing up on his shoulders even if it meant melted ice cream in his hair. A man that was hard as granite and softer than the soil, always cooking something that would make any day seem warmer. A man with the color of life in his eyes and ice in his voice that curled into his arms and whispered his fears of failure.  _ **_Exterminated._ **

Xaldin drank. He drank and he ignored the looks and whispers. The halls were too quiet, the wrong rooms empty. Xaldin drank and he let himself slip further and further from what could have been. What was the use of humanity? Of a heart? Let Xemnas use him for his wills; he had none of his own, not anymore.

Luxord would dole out the cards and make him bet the bottles, tricking and maybe even cheating them out of his reach. But there was always the next day and another to find. He wasn’t trying to find it, but he only felt relief when the end finally found him.

Being Dilan again is easier, much much easier. Waking to find Ienzo and Aeleus anxiously waiting for himself and Even to awaken...much easier. Dilan shoves the past, those long white months away. They don’t matter now. Things are better. Things are perfect.

Lord Ansem comes home, Even comes home. They speak of atonement and Dilan shakes his head.  _ Xehanort’s fault, Xemnas’s fault. Yet he took the girl, twisted the man into a beast like himself. _

What a stupid drunk pawn he was.

The cold snaps at his face and Dilan closes his eyes with a sigh. 

“If we wanted a gargoyle, we would have had you position yourself up on the roof.” The voice snaps slightly louder than the wind and the cold around Dilan leeches away. He turns and frowns at Even. Even is wrapped in more layers than he is, a thick scarf around his neck, but one hand is ungloved and glowing slightly as he redirects the cold around them. “Is there a reason you’re attempting to freeze yourself to the stones right at the top of the steps?” Even arches one pale eyebrow.

Dilan scowls at him, but the cold and the dark in him have stolen his usual replies. They could verbally spar for hours usually, but now...he just wants to be alone. With a shake of his head, he turns back to look down at the square. It’s still empty, abandoned, but for the snow that’s building on everything. More blows past him as Even sends it out in a burst.

The other man stands beside him and with a gesture, Dilan widens the winds around them so Even’s hair won’t end up in his face. Even is eyeing him, but he stares resolutely away. A shame that it won’t stop Even; nothing ever does.

True to form, it takes less than a minute for Even to speak again. “Dilan, is there something the matter?”

He shakes his head. “Everything’s perfect,” he says shortly.

“Oh yes, I can tell things are simply fantastic for you.” Even smacks his arm with the back of his gloved hand. “If you don’t tell me what’s the matter, then I will have to take matters into my own hands. I know you detest that. Shall I make wild guesses?” Clearly, Even had the eggnog before coming out and is content to chatter until Dilan or the storm chases him back inside.

Dilan exhales loudly, cutting him off. “Nothing is the matter. I’m keeping watch for anyone in trouble.”

“In the storm.” Even looks toward the square, his hair shifting despite the wind avoiding them. The man simply has too much of it.  _ It was still soft as a Nobody, but nothing about it made him feel anything. He simply remembered caring about it Before. _ Now, Even shoves it back as he scoffs. “Dilan, anyone who would need help has already been helped. Everyone found shelter yesterday. You and Aeleus walked through town to make sure.”

“Someone might have left foolishly.”

“As you have?” The words are sharp and Dilan looks around with a scowl. Even arches an eyebrow. “You should be inside with the rest of us. Nothing is going to happen out here until this storm blows over. No one wants to risk it and this place...it’s earned the peace. Everyone is enjoying the holiday for the first time in years.”

There’s something deep and dark in Even’s eyes: guilt and grief. Dilan swallows and looks away. “It’s not our fault.”  _ It’s not his fault. He only did it because of Xehanort, because of Xemnas. Not because he wanted to make everyone else feel the empty gaping hole that he did… _

A warm hand wraps around his arm and tugs. “Foolish man. Do you think looking away makes me believe that lie? It is not our fault entirely, but guilt comes regardless of measure.” Even tugs him toward the door and Dilan...Dilan can’t find it in him to argue. He’s frozen and feeling it now that Even’s touch is on him. Strange how much a man of ice can thaw him. Dilan follows the tug and Even back across the stones and through the heavy front door.

Despite the old stone, the heat inside is immediately soothing. Dilan sighs and rubs his hands together, Even withdrawing the grip on his arm. He doesn’t look up at the lights or the green decorations they’ve hung. The stones and himself and Even are all that he wants now. To be soothed by the warmth is one thing, but he cannot jump back into the celebration he fled in the first place.

Even pulls his other glove off and squints down the hall. “Get yourself something warm, Dilan. If you try to go back outside, I’ll freeze the doors shut.” He stays standing by the doors, clearly not going to move until Dilan is safely away from them.

Dilan rolls his eyes and tosses his coat at Even. “You hang that up then.” He moves away from Even and the doors, and away from the living room that has so much conversation going on that it spills into the hall. Freezing himself in some kind of penance is hardly the answer, but neither is pretending that he’s fine. The beads braided into his hair are still cold from outside, giving sharp little smacks to his cheeks as he moves swiftly toward the kitchen.

It is unlikely that the kitchen will be entirely empty, but its usual presence is the most constant one Dilan’s had in his life. If anything is a good match for his rough edges, it is Aeleus’s calm steadiness. Dilan pauses outside the entryway, listening, but there’s nothing. He leans in and the kitchen is empty, a good second choice. Rubbing at his neck, Dilan moves to make himself a drink.  _ Something warm… _

Hot chocolate is too sweet for most occasions, but maybe he needs it tonight. Opening the fridge, Dilan reaches for the carton, but stops when he sees the bottles set neatly beside it. Eggnog, the sort that Ansem favors in the winter season, is perfect for when it’s cold out. Dilan takes one of the bottles, turning it in his hand as he closes the fridge.  _ Holiday cheer, it could be faked. _ Dilan frowns at himself, at the bottle, at the very idea that maybe he needs this, to be numb again. If everything is buried, then it can’t hurt anymore, right? His fingers are cold from outside, the bottle chilled from the fridge. He could be...happier.

“That eager to lose our next game?” The smooth voice comes from behind him along with the all-too-familiar rustle of cards. Dilan turns to find Rould smirking at him, cards shuffling back and forth between his hands. He’s quick, but not as quick as the winds.

Scowling at him, Dilan nods to the cards. “We’re not playing with your tarot cards.”

Rould looks down, stopping their motion, and flicks one out so he can see the face of it. “Ah, you are correct. I suppose I grabbed the wrong deck after I finished doing readings for the children.” He slides them neatly back into a stack and pockets them. “The offer of a game still stands.” He holds his hand out, fingers twitching twice.

Dilan hands the bottle over. “Not with that crowd watching. I have feelings to be hurt now when you cheat me out of too much munny.”

It gets him a chuckle, but he can feel the gaze on him. Dilan waves a hand at the bottle. “I doubt it’s as bad as it was when Braig helped mix it, but if you want something better, I was going to make hot chocolate.”

“I believe there’s a pitcher of it in the room already.”

Dilan grunts rather than respond and Rould hums. “I see.” He sets the bottle back in the fridge and hands Dilan the milk. “It is a bit uncomfortable to mix as if we’ve never crossed each other before. Roxas’s eyes…” He shakes his head. “Too long lacking a heart makes it very hard to know how to speak feelings aloud.”

_ They both see him so well. _ Dilan sighs and starts to heat the milk on the stove. “Roxas is the easy one if you ask me. Though Aeleus disagrees.”

“Yes, well, Aeleus always was quite the father from what I heard.” Rould leans against the counter beside the stove. Absently, another card slides from his sleeve to flip between his fingers. “He would take such heartless actions hard once he could feel again. You would find the whole thing easy to shrug off. Did you work it out with a spar in the yard?”

Dilan snorts and tucks his braids behind his ears before they fall in his way. “Showed the kid how to make a rubber band shooter out of those popsicle sticks he always has actually.”

Rould actually frowns. “So I have you to blame for the nonsense I was caught in the middle of earlier.” He folds his arms over his chest. “Clearly, you were the bad influence on Ienzo.”

“I can’t argue that. Taught the kid to swear.” Dilan grabs a mug for each of them and the hot chocolate mix. It doesn’t take long for the milk to warm and then they’re each stirring their drinks.

Dilan takes a long sip and then sighs. He’s warmer now, inside and out, but still...the emptiness lingers. Rould is observing him again with that calculated gaze, his quick fingers always making the temptation vanish before Dilan could fall into it and break himself apart. A gambler knows the stakes best of all and when exactly to end the game. Dilan isn’t good at words, but he brushes their arms together and tries for a smile. “Not bad.”

Rould arches an eyebrow and smiles back. He takes a sip of his own. “Not bad,” he agrees. “The game?”

“Fine, in a bit. I want to speak to Aeleus first.”

Rould winks. “Oh, of course. A bit of winter luck to be had? Good luck in extracting him from hosting duties to steal it.” He’s shameless and Dilan can only roll his eyes. Rould smirks and takes his leave from the kitchen, calling over his shoulder, “He was keeping an eye on the treats so no bare plate dare sully the display.”

Of course he’s in the center of the party. Dilan exhales in exhaustion, in annoyance, and leans against the counter a moment longer. He could wait. Dirty platters must come back here. But he wants to see Aeleus now, wants to feel the steady presence that has almost always been at his side. They were the force meant to protect this place, together.

_ That had been broken too and nothing seemed to close the gap. _

His next drink is scalding, but he leaves the kitchen under its power. He makes it down the hall and to one of the entrances to the living area. The light and noise are all so  _ bright and happy _ and Dilan closes his eyes. He can face a party. Half of it is his family.

_ She elbows him in the gut and snatches the glass case from his other arm. He can hear them cheering as she sprints away from him. Such little-. He could send a spear through her from here, listen to their happy cheers turn to cries of rage and anguish. _

_ He can’t. She won, she beat him, and he can respect that. The spark in her eyes reminds him of others. _

Nothing is truly broken. They bested Xaldin, they bested  _ him _ in the end, taking their happy ending. Any damage he’s done...it can be fixed. Even and Ienzo and Ansem have shouldered so much of the blame and also far too much of the work. Dilan breathes and turns and enters the living room.

No one immediately greets him, calling out his name. He can see them all spread around, the kids playing games and eating snacks, Rould lounging in a chair, still sipping from the same mug Dilan gave him. Even has made it back, sitting by the fireplace and talking with Ansem in words that probably have at least four syllables. It’s...nice even with the noise. Much better than the stiff feeling of everyone seated at an overlarge table.

Dilan crosses the room to the tables covered with dishes of snacks and pitchers of drinks. Like the most serious of guards, Aeleus keeps watch as people come and go. One silver-haired child, not a child anymore, is turning a pastry back and forth in front of his eye as if it will spring to life and bite him.

“Pretty sure Aeleus made sure it stopped moving before it came in here,” Dilan tells Ienzo as he comes up beside him.

Ienzo’s nose wrinkles and he turns it to face Dilan. “Then why exactly did he give it little berry eyes?”

Dilan shrugs and looks at Aeleus. “It’s cute,” he guesses. Aeleus nods.

“Cute,” Ienzo repeats flatly. He twists the little curled snake pasty back to looking at him. “I can’t eat it.” He sets it down and grabs an eclair. “Where have you been, Dilan? You disappeared over an hour ago.”

He’s always been too smart for his own good. Dilan takes a sip of his drink and shrugs. “I got overheated. I went outside to cool off rather than chuck someone out a window into the snow.”

Ienzo grins. “It was Lea, wasn’t it? I thought he started the shootout.”

Dilan looks at Aeleus again. The corner of Aeleus’s mouth twitches up. (He knows.) Dilan snorts. “It wasn’t Lea specifically. It’s been a while since we had this many people in one room. It gets hot.”

“I guess so.” Ienzo looks around the room and Dilan can feel the emptiness in him, already trailing away, crack into pieces. Even’s son, their son, has grown through so much hardship, but he’s here and he’s happy and he has a future again. Dilan ruffles his hair, making Ienzo squawk.

“Do me a favor and go beat Rould at cards.”

Ienzo smirks slowly. “He cheats, you know.”

“You’re smart enough to cheat better.” Dilan gives him a small push that direction. “Warm him up for me.”

“Ah, I see. You want to make him feel better after losing to me.” Ienzo grins and marches away before Dilan can mess up his hair again.

Aeleus shakes his head. “You shouldn’t encourage him to do such things.” He gestures for Dilan to come around the table and join him. As if Dilan was going anywhere else.

It’s a slight change, but looking from behind the table, Dilan can see the whole room, the whole group as they relax and celebrate that after such tumultuous times their world is still here and they are together. He sighs and lets the cold white in his thoughts be melted under this consuming warmth and light. Aeleus settles an arm around his shoulders. “Even was worried about you. I told him you probably needed the break. This is...much after so little.”

“I did need the break...but I needed him to come after me too.” Dilan isn’t dense. He can see the way they’re all keeping an eye on him...and each other. “I thought it’d be easy to be normal again.”

“We lost a number of years. And you had another year longer.” Aeleus pulls him closer and Dilan leans in, closing his eyes. “I’m sorry, Dilan.”

He wants to cry, because he can now, because he didn’t let himself before. He could, no one would judge. But he breathes through it, breathes in the now. Aeleus is so warm, so solid and real again. Dilan looks up at him and shakes his head. “Not your fault. None of us...we didn’t have many choices. We were desperate.”

Aeleus leans his head down and rests their foreheads together. “It would be in poor taste to thank them, but sometimes I am tempted to. Our reunion came because of them.”

Dilan smiles. “I’ll not thank the kid for beating me to literal nothingness...but I’m so glad to be here with you again.” He tilts his head and kisses Aeleus, the one he fell for first and arguably hardest. Aeleus kisses him back, still a delightful shock down his spine.

Someone, no doubt blond and smirking, wolf-whistles, but Dilan just flips him off and leans into Aeleus. Aeleus chuckles, arm wrapped around him, and Dilan can only just remember the cold outside.

He wasn’t in a celebratory mood, but as Dilan moves between the members of his family, the pieces of his heart, he finds things worth being happy for after these long, cold years.


End file.
